She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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