I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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