he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
