I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
