Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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