I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Randomize
