So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Randomize
