we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Randomize
