If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
