I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize