i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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