yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
