That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
