First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
