She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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