Well douche your snatch and let's go!
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
