we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
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