Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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