I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize