If you die in college, do you die in real life?
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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