Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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