I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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