i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize