Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Randomize
