FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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