This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
