Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
