If i come over, it means nothing
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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