who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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