Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
