Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
