Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
