at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Randomize
