quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
My breasts were aching with rage.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
