Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
