You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Randomize
