if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
