i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
