Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
