i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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