Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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