Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
