He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
