ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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