Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
