OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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