If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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