what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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