I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
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