I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I hate all girls vehemently.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
